Somehow, right around the time I was learning to butter toast, the phrase “women’s intuition” germinated with what was – for any child – a too vast knowledge of I Love Lucy plots. The result was an underlying idea that whatever women think they know, they should just mind their own business anyway.
It took me years of adult living, therapy, seeking and following wise teachers, and developing the habit of doing spiritual practice regularly every once in a while, to realize that my intuition is in fact, an amazingly strong, brilliant and fun tool.
I’ve noticed a pattern that kind of goes like this: some notion I remember from one class (and it may be what seems like a very trivial thing at the time), will layer with one of the few ideas or feelings I remember from a book or movie years later, and so on. Little pieces of seemingly random information begin to build on each other. The key is to not shrug it off when the mind (spirit?) joins these memories together.
One of my growing intuition chains grew another link today. It started years ago with a documentary – I don’t even remember which one – about the U.S. prison system. Viewing it left me enraged. I noticed that every time I learned more about the so called “criminal justice system”, my emotions were strong.
Eventually, I had to admit, “I’m passionate about this.” Which, in itself was delightful because, once I took this workshop where they asked us to list our passions, and I was like: Uh, ice cream? No, not ice cream. Left with a blank page at the end of that exercise.
So, to have my breath quicken over JUSTICE, repeatedly, two or four times, every few years or so, was enough to teach me, Oh, this is what having a passion feels like! I remember telling my little sister, “I’m not ready yet, but someday, I want to get involved with prison reform.” That was years ago.
This morning, I lifted the lid to my computer before I was fully awake. Julia Cameron would be so proud. I had it in mind to email a thank you note to a woman I met at a meeting a couple weeks ago. First, I wanted to read more about her work, so I found an article about her on-line. The piece happened to be about several women. It was so interesting, that I got drawn into reading about a different woman – a person I had never heard of. Less than a minute in, a quote popped out at me.
“I have become passionate about the need to reform our criminal justice system, which is criminal but not just . . . I believe that, despite all evidence to the contrary, the criminal justice system can be reformed.”
Bing bing bing bing bing. Yes! A new teacher . . . the journey continues.
What set me to writing about it is how good this feels. Feels. Physically. Literally in my body. That is intuition.
It can cause those pains when we need to be stopping or pulling away, but it also causes the feeling I have right now, when I’m exhilarated into running toward something, when I get the validation, that Yes! This is my path.