And Now We Vine

If you haven’t heard, there’s a new verb in town. And by town, I mean the planet Earth — where no one has to feel isolated whilst waiting alone in a doctor’s office ever again, where hours of insomnia are more entertaining than ever before, where most people Google, the young tumble, housewives pin, and professionals tweet, where blogging is mainstream, even grandfathers text, instagrammers flee to Flickr, and now we vine.

Don’t ask me what Vine is. That’s what Google is for. Just do yourself a favor and mute your audio before pressing play on this baby.

That was our breakfast yesterday. You know I have a caffeine buzz when I put make-up-free shots of myself on the web.

So far, Vine is yet another place where an attention seeker such as myself is feeling unappreciated.

There. There. I’m admitting the ugly truth you’ve known about me all along. I’m in it for the likes.

Today, David Sedaris posted a long ass status update (his first) and within 16 minutes he had over 3600 thumbs up. I commented,

“David. Welcome to posting at FB. I love you so much that I’m going to tell you what I’m afraid to tell Anne Lamott: this status update is too long. Facebook updates fall between tweets and blog posts in length, but should be far closer to tweet-length. Three sentences. Ironically, comments can be longer; and I’m not sure why.”

Yeah, I know. I’m not the police of Facebook. But Anne Lamott’s updates really are too long, and I really am too afraid to tell her, and also, perhaps I would have over ninety seven thousand or half a million subscribers if I had actually published brilliant work prolifically like they continue to do.

It would be easier if I weren’t so busy vining.

Here’s one of Cat Two (or Three, if you’re counting our dearly departed Lily…. and we are, of course we are….. so scratch the numbering.) This is Ruby the Fetch Playing Cat whose six second short film has (preposterously) received zero likes at Vine, and nary a RT nor a Favorite to be heard of. Frown.


It’s been a little over an hour since I first posted this, and already, a revisit to Vine has washed away my feelings of neglect. The feed of folks I follow currently features:

  • Flying birds eating from the hands of a person on a coast in Britain
  • Sweet tonal “yums” of a brunch being cooked in Canada (Btw, Ruby really likes your looping voice, Schmutzie.)
  • Norman the Scooter Dog scooting – wind in fur – towards the camera in New Orleans
  • And the funny “dadandblog” who’s already making :06 films I find artfully delicious. If you decide to vine, follow him, for sure.

Go Vine! (It’s a noun in that sentence.)

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